Baby Bump Update - 100 Days Left!

I can't believe we will meet our little guy in just 100 days (countdown set to my scheduled c-section)!  I was shocked when I looked at my countdown app a couple nights ago!  This little guy keeps me up at night.  On average I have slept maybe 3-4 hours a night the last couple weeks.  I have to visit the bathroom at least once every hour.  I have to ice my back throughout the day. I HAVE to eat cereal and look at Pinterest late at night.  Usually at 12:30 on the dot.  My allergies are so brutal right now, I can't breathe.  But the funny thing is, I enjoy it.  It's quiet, and I get to spend time with just Beckham.  It's the time he is most active, and I know that I won't be pregnant again so I'm really soaking it all in.

Beckham's due date is Thanksgiving Day.  Of course, he will be here before that, but he's our little Thanksgiving Baby!  I really enjoyed summer, especially since the heat has been so mild here in Oklahoma, but I am SO ready for fall.  The weather, the activities, the FOOD, the multitude of pumpkin desserts, and the holidays with a sweet new baby boy.

The next couple months will FLY by I know, so I'm also trying to enjoy these moments with my girls.  Brooke starts school on Thursday and turns FIVE in just a few weeks.  The twins start school (one day a week) in September.  Tear. They are all so excited....I can't believe how big they are getting to be.   

We got a LOT done this weekend in Beckham's Nursery.  I wanted to add a few rustic elements to his room, so I found a branch that worked perfectly (and was free!) for the curtain rod.  I finished making the bed skirt with stitch witchery, of course.  Total cost for the skirt was $5!  I love looking in there and seeing it all come together!

Here are a few funnies from the sisters lately....they are really cracking me up with all their questions.

"Did Beckham go poop?  You need to change his diaper, he stinks" - Lauren (while going #2)

"Did Beckham take a nap when I did?  Oh he's still sleeping - WAKE UP BECKHAM!!!" - also Lauren

"I need to give Kep-bam kisses and hugs" - Lily (sometimes she confuses his name, but she is always hugging and kissing my belly)

"Does Beckham want some of my cookie (as she smears a fudge round all over my shirt)?" - Lily

"Wow mom your belly is getting big, but not too big yet.  You look so cute" - Brooke

I love them.

Baby Bump Update & a NAME!!!

We finally came up with the perfect name for our little guy.  

Beckham Andrew. His initials will spell "BAM" which wasn't intentional, but very fitting if any of you know Landon's personality.  We love it and think it fits our family just right!  I can't wait to see what he will look like!  We had our major ultrasound at 22 weeks.  We saw all his little fingers and toes.  Everything looked great, and he is even measuring a week (his head TWO!) ahead of schedule.  I'm thankful for a healthy baby and a very active companion.  During the ultrasound we thought he looked just like Lily!

Here's Lily on the left at 21 weeks.  Beckham on the right at 22 weeks.  I just love technology!

I've been really praying and researching VBAC options.  I have a great doctor who is also a great surgeon, and I was able to recover from my C-Section fairly quickly than I expected (even without pain meds). With three girls and a baby, I really would love to avoid the surgery if possible and talked to my doctor about options at my appointment.  We scheduled a C-Section for 39 weeks.  If I happen to go into labor before then, we will try to pursue the VBAC.  I am finally at peace with the decision, knowing that if God wants me to deliver VBAC He will allow everything to fall into place before the surgery date.  I kept in mind the trauma with Brooke, and almost having to be taken to a C-Section. I want to do what is best for Beckham and I.  I know God is going to take care of us either way and I am trusting Him completely!

I have been SO indecisive this pregnancy.  About everything.  I second guess almost every decision I make, and that's not like me!  After returning two sets of bedding, I finally decided on something that I just LOVE!  It's very neutral, clean and simple.  I am currently working on a bedskirt out of the chevron fabric, and am almost done refinishing a dresser to use as a changing table.  I can't wait to see the room come together in the next couple months!  Of course, I will post some pictures when It's all done!

I'm so thankful for sweet girls that are so excited to meet their baby brother.  There are times where I get overwhelmed and wonder how we will get along with 4 kids.  Then I remember that God never gives us more than we can handle!  I can trust Him to take care of us just as He always has!

"You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you."   -Isaiah 26:3

"half-baked"

Well we made it to the HALFWAY mark!  Every time I feel our sweet baby kick, I smile.  Which is a great thing....the last couple weeks have been a little rocky around here for me physically.  I have also really struggled with worry, fear and discouragement.   God is good ALL the time, and I can definitely say that I have been worse.  I'm really trying to enjoy this last pregnancy, soak in all the happy times, and trust in God to take care of my family.  God has reminded me over and over again how blessed we are.  How He always takes care of His children, and that HIS plans are best.  Those little kicks are a constant reminder to me of how amazing He is. 

"You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you." 

Isaiah 26:3

I have my "big" ultrasound in two weeks....I can't wait to see our little guy in detail!  Of course I will update with pictures!!!

We are excited about preparing for our sweet little boy. Here is a little collage of a few of my favorite things....

My Girls // Summer is hard.  It's hot, we are bored, and I can only do so much physically.  Sometimes I feel guilty that I can't be "super mom" (or even normal mom) to them, but they know that I love them and that's what matters!  I have watched them adapt, and learn to play together.  Brooke is the Mommy, Lauren is the Daddy and Lily is the Baby.  And it's a HOOT.  Whenever the twins see me in pain or sick, they come and put their hand on my belly and tell me they love me.  It just doesn't get any better than that.  

Ralph Lauren // I love when my girls wear their clothes, but I have always gazed longingly into the baby boy section at the store.  It's just my favorite...there was a GREAT sale at the outlet in Texas and I just couldn't resist this cute polo.

Target // I have some pretty sweet friends that are throwing me a little baby shower.  I feel so honored and blessed.  I know this is my FOURTH baby after all.  :)  I registered for a few things at target, and received a great goodie bag with free products and coupons!!!

Boots //  Who knew the North Face made infant booties???  I just couldn't resist...

Diapers // I decided to order some diapers from The Honest Company.  They are plant based, non toxic disposable diapers AND they come in the cutest patterns! I used a 40% off coupon on my first "bundle" and then cancelled my subscription after I received my first shipment.  I'm excited to try them out!

Baby Steals // I'm not sure if any of you sign up to receive alerts from Baby Steals or not, but I LOVE their deals!  They have deals on great products like Aden + Anais, Petunia Pickle Bottom and Ergo!

***name update - we are still debating - this baby will have a name, even if it's after he arrives!***

It's a BOY!!!!

We found out Friday afternoon that baby #4 is a BOY!  I'm still in a little bit of unbelief.  I mean, we had plans for a girl.  Her name would be Charlotte (we would call her Charlie), her hair would probably be red, and her room would be decorated in gold & coral.  :)  Everyone who knows me, knows I have always wanted boys.  God gave us three girls, and that is now my comfort zone.  I was sure #4 was a girl, but I am so elated that it's a boy!  I know that a mother/son relationship is so special and I can't wait to experience it!

Here's my sweet baby boy sucking his thumb.  He did this throughout the entire ultrasound.  When they turned on the 4D, he looked like a miniature Landon.  The twins were playing on the floor oblivious, but Brooke watched the entire time in awe of this little baby moving around the screen.  I can't wait to see their faces when they meet their baby brother.  

A few ways this pregnancy has been completely different:

*The cravings in the first trimester.  I didn't eat much, but when I did all I wanted to eat was meat, chips and biscuits and gravy.  I had to stop myself from driving to McDonalds everyday to get sausage and gravy biscuits.  I'm not a huge meat eater, so I'm thankful those cravings have ended!  

*I am not nearly as sick as with the other two pregnancies.  I'm so thankful as I have 3 girls to take care of!  I found out that the extreme pain I was having is my gull bladder.  If I am very careful what I eat, I can avoid the problems there.

*I felt the baby at 14 weeks.  That is SO early for me!  I love having the constant company though - it's always so reassuring to me to feel those little kicks and bumps!

Such a sweet little face!  I'm so thankful for this blessing that God has given us.  Every little milestone is still so exciting to me - I can actually enjoy them even more this time since I'm not in/out of the hospital and on bed rest!  Our family is complete with two very handsome bookends! I know he will be just like his daddy!

I also want to thank everyone for all your emails, congrats, posts on facebook and especially your PRAYERS. They are very much appreciated!!!

Pregnancy Update (almost) 17 weeks!

Here's the latest "bump" photo.  The ruffles really help disguise my in-between belly.  I may/may not have worn that shirt 3 times last week.  Thursday will bring week 17 AND a Doctor's appointment.  I'm excited/anxious to see if Dr. Baab will be able to tell us the gender!  I'm hoping that baby will cooperate!  Brooke has officially decided that she wants a baby brother.  Of course, that could change tomorrow.  Either way, the girls are going to be the sweetest big sisters to this little one!

A few funny things....

Brooke keeps asking when my belly will get bigger.  She told me... "Are you sure there is a baby in there?  Because it doesn't look like it."  Oh honey - it will get bigger soon enough....

Sunday at church I started getting cramps/stomach pains.  I think a huge contributor was the fact that I stuffed myself into a pair of "normal" pants, and really should stop denying the fact that I need to wear maternity pants.  Sigh.

Sweet Lily, when she sees me sick or in pain, she asks me "Is your baby hurting?".  It's just the cutest thing.

A few not so funny things...

The last week has been a rough one for my physically.  Whenever I start to get discouraged, I try to remember that I've been worse.   I started feeling a lot of pressure/sharp pains/chest pains over the last couple days.  Monday was a very hard day for me, but I did NOT want to miss VBS.  I called my doctor, and they wanted me to come in to do labs the next morning, so I just kept trucking along.  The kids in our group at VBS have stolen my heart....so I forced myself to get to church.  We went to the church dinner, and as soon as we got to our station to receive our group, I started having trouble breathing.  I told Landon I had to go to the emergency room and make sure that everything was okay.  Thankfully, the hospital is just a mile away....I drove myself there so Landon could stay and work.  

They did an ultrasound first and thankfully baby was doing GREAT and bouncing around!!!

All the labs came back great as well, so I felt so silly thinking there was something seriously wrong.  Slightly dehydrated, but other than that everything looked great.  Better safe than sorry, right?  I know I need to slow down a little and take it easy.  

I have been so blessed this pregnancy.  I don't feel great, but like I said I have been so much worse.  In comparison, God has been so good to allow me to feel well enough to take care of my family!

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Baby Talk - 14 Week Update

I still laugh out loud when I think about April 1, 2013.  What an epic day.  We found out we were pregnant with Baby #4.  Between a trip to Destin, baby appointments, Brooke graduating from preschool, and keeping up with three cuties, the last couple months have just flown by! 

I'm so glad I took this picture.  Don't mistake Landon's expression as anger - more like utter shock.  Kind of like when I called the Dr's office and asked if three pregnancy tests could be a false positive.  And checked the directions on each test to make sure I read the results right.  TOO.  FUNNY.

Here is a progression of our little baby.  It's amazing to see how much he/she grows every couple weeks.  I cry every time.  It's always a reminder of how amazing God is to create this life within me!  

Here are a few questions I get asked a lot...

"Was this planned???"

Well, it was not in OUR plan, but most definitely in God's plan.  There were many fears that still linger in my mind, but I have to trust that God is going to take care of our family and our sweet baby!

"How are you feeling???"

I'm also thankful for the encouragement and support system I have from family and friends.  My last two pregnancies were pretty hard.  For those who witnessed my pregnancy with twins were especially concerned when they found out I was pregnant.  I have to stay on top of taking my medication around the clock, and watch the foods that I eat. Thankfully, this pregnancy is better so far!

"So are you hoping for a boy???" 

We are hoping for a healthy baby.  I don't have a  strong"feeling" about the baby's gender, but I lean more towards a girl when people ask.  I know we will be equally excited when we find out (hopefully soon!) though!  So far, we have a girl name that we love, and I already have the nursery planned for a girl.  We can't agree on a boy name, and I just don't have any boy design ideas in mind.  lol.  

"Are the girls excited???"

They sure are!  The girls are always talking about the baby.  We have gotten just a few baby essentials, and wrapped them up for the baby.  We plan to let the girls open all the gifts when we get closer to time...they are so excited. They already have the seating arrangement perfected in the car, Lauren likes to kiss my belly and I just know all three of them will be the best big sisters.  

"When are you due???"

November 29th is my official due date.  My doctor will schedule the C-Section for 39 weeks, and we will be home to enjoy Thanksgiving as a family.  I'm so excited about having a fall/winter baby!  I know it will be extra special this year around Thanksgiving and Christmas as we enjoy our tiny blessing.  

I'm so thankful for all of your prayers for our family!  It is so much appreciated!  

His Plans...

When I look at these photographs, tears come to my eyes.  Being a mom of three can be a struggle at times, but the blessings definitely outweigh those hard times.  I am also reminded of how great His plan is for each of us is.  When Landon and I got married, we "planned" to wait a couple years to start trying to get pregnant.  Well, God had something greater for us and her name was Brooke.  Even on birth control, I became pregnant with her soon after our wedding.  That day wasn't full of excitement for Landon and I.  We sat on our couch crying, wondering how we were going to be parents.  It took a few days for us, but we started to get excited about our little "bean".  We also weren't prepared for the horrible pregnancy I was about to encounter.  During my pregnancies I suffer from hyperemesis gravidarum.  I spent several times in the emergency room, and a couple overnight stays in the hospital getting fluids during this pregnancy.  God was so good to us and kept Brooke perfectly healthy.  She is such a blessing to us with her sweet spirit and loving heart.  

We knew we didn't want Brooke to be an only child, but our plan was to have only two children close together.  We tried for almost 8 months, which I know isn't that long compared to many of you, but it seemed like an eternity to us!  We were overjoyed when we found out we were expecting again.  Those next couple weeks were a trial for us as I was extremely sick, and was in the emergency room for a LOT of bleeding.  I went to Tulsa for HCG tests every other day, since there was no other way to tell if the pregnancy was still viable.  At 8 weeks, we waited in the ultrasound room just praying that the baby was alive.  Not only did we see one babies heartbeat, we saw TWO.  God had blessed us greatly, and again we saw that our plans are not always HIS plans.  Our family was about to go from three to five!  Countless emergency room visits, hospital stays, trips to the cancer treatment center for nutrients, many precious prayers and twenty weeks of bed rest later we met our beautiful twin girls Lily & Lauren.  They were born at 36 1/2 weeks and never saw the NICU.  Wow, His goodness, love and strength are so amazing.

Brooke is almost five, and the twins will be three in June!  I can't believe how fast the time has gone by.  I sometimes questioned if we would have another baby in the future.  Over the last six months, I had a peace in my heart that we would not be having any more children.  I was a little sad, but after potty training the girls and selling every baby item we had in our home I knew that I was ready to focus on the girls and our future together. 

 Did I mention that our plans are not always HIS plans???

Rewind to April Fools Day.  I have been having some problems physically (to spare the details) since the twins were born.  Even though I didn't think it was possible, I had an overwhelming feeling to take a pregnancy test.  I packed the kids up in the car and headed to wal-mart.  Yep.  You guessed it.  It was positive.  

Is my husband going to believe me, it's April Fools???

What are we going to do?

We just sold EVERYTHING baby!

What is everyone going to think about us???

Sigh.  Sadly, those were the first thoughts that came to mind.  I called Landon (i wish i had that conversation recorded) and he brought home more tests.  Yep, no false positives.   It took a few hours to get over the shock.  It was a comfort to know that God wouldn't give us anything we couldn't handle, and this was no surprise to Him!  Children are blessings, and I know He is going to give us everything we need to take care of this little one. We saw the doctor a few days later and our little baby was 6 weeks old!  He or she will be here right before Thanksgiving! Believe it or not, Landon is hoping for another girl!  We will be equally excited either way, although I would love to experience that mother/son relationship!

The girls are all of course, expecting a little sister and love talking about the baby!

Thanks to medication, I am feeling a lot better than my other pregnancies.  I have gotten to see our little baby 3 times already, and it never gets old.  Seeing his/her little heart beating is the most amazing miracle.  We have had amazing family and friends encourage us along the way.  I'm so thankful for His blessings, and that His plan that is greater than anything I could ever imagine.  

Our sweet baby at 10 weeks - may be a soccer player - look at that kick!

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a FUTURE and a HOPE."

-Jeremiah 29:11-

just a year ago...

Brooke couldn't wait to meet her "babies"

Oh this was about 2 days before I had the babies. Ready to POP!

Our little family of THREE!

One of the happiest moments of my life...meeting #2 & #3

Just a year ago I was anxiously awaiting the date of our scheduled c-section set for June 10, 2010. The week was filled with trips to the doctor, special ultrasounds, and visits to the cancer treatment center for vitamin infusions. I spent a lot of time laying in bed and floating in the pool to keep those girls baking as long as possible. We tried to spend as much time with Brooke before we rocked her world by adding TWO babies to our little home. I remember just crying on our bed with Landon the night before the big day. I was feeling every emotion possible...I was excited, fearful, nervous, anxious, and relieved we had made it so far. Let's just say my pregnancy was so physically painful I did not take any pain medication stronger than tylenol after my section. It just didn't seem like anything in comparison to the previous 36 weeks. Every minute of those 36 weeks was completely worth it and forgotten when I heard those little cries in that operating room. It all seemed like such a little sacrifice for such a BIG blessing.

Today....almost a year later I am in awe of how I can love 3 little girls SO much. They have each brought such joy to our lives. Parenting has shown us how inadequate we are without the Lord's strength. He has provided for our every need and has given us the strength and love to get through each day. We are excited to celebrate this first year that the Lord has graciously given us with our sweet little girls.

My Pregnancy Story

Delivery Day! 5:45, and SO happy to meet my girls

I just can't explain the relief that I felt hearing these screams!

My sweet girls

9 months ago I was 9 months pregnant with the twins. It is so hard to believe how quickly the time as gone by! I have had so many friends ask about my pregnancies...so I thought I would share a little bit about that with you all. I hope it will encourage you!

Landon and I have been married for 41 months. Out of those 41 months, I was pregnant for 18 and nursing for 21. So for almost 40 of those months, I was either throwing up on an hourly basis, or eating everything in sight to keep up with my milk supply. Added to that are the hormones that can get out of control. He got one month of "normal", and that was the first month of our marriage in the "honeymoon stage"! Poor husband.

With both pregnancies, I had extreme problems with keeping food down. I threw up the entire pregnancies several times a day. Hyperemesis Gravidarum is the medical term for what the doctor diagnosed me with. This pregnancy had a rocky start. At week 5, after a lot of bleeding and my first ER visit, we weren't sure if we were still pregnant. I had my HCG levels checked every other day. They seemed to rise slightly under the normal rate, and certainly not at the rate of a twin pregnancy. The next 3 weeks were the longest weeks of waiting. At 8 weeks we saw the heartbeat...of TWO babies. We were so relieved and shocked at the same time. While pregnant with the twins, my body could hardly keep up with the pregnancy. I was in and out of the urgent care/emergency room...getting fluids twice a week. My doctor threatened to put me on feeding tubes every week if I did not start gaining a pound a week. Every week I would pray that I would gain the weight so I would not have to stay in the hospital. At week 20, I was placed on bed rest. For me, that was the hardest thing to face...especially with a very active 1 year old. Every time I stood up and walked around, I would immediately start having contractions. I knew that I needed to obey his orders for the health of the twins. By week 30 I really struggled with Anemia and malnutrition. I was so anemic, the doctor didn't even know how I was standing without passing out. I had to visit the cancer treatment center to receive IV's for Iron and other nutrients. I was in so much pain, but in the midst of all these physical trials the Lord really made His love clear to our family. I knew that this pain and suffering was only temporary. In just a few short months I would get to hold two of the sweetest baby girls in my arms and forget about it all.

How did we get through this time? Only by HIS strength and grace. My husband is amazing. He always encouraged me, kept me calm, reminded me of truth, helped with the house, did the dishes, played with Brooke and loved me sacrificially on a daily basis. God gave me such a gift when He gave me Landon. I can't even begin to count the number of people who prayed for us during those long months. I am so thankful for a mom who couldn't always be near, but prayed very fervently for my family. I am also thankful for a mother-in-law who also prayed, but was also a true servant to us. We moved into the Miller's home when I was placed on bed rest. Poppy and Gi Gi helped us all through a very hard time, and gave sacrificially by sharing their home with us. Our church family prayed for us, and also sent ladies to help me once a week for almost 8 months! We are thankful for our friends and family who were an encouragement by sending notes, emails and cards and uplifting us in prayer. "Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need." Hebrews 4:16.

June 10, 2010 we finally got to meet Lily & Lauren. Born by C-Section at week 36. Lily was 5'10 & Lauren was 6'1". Despite the physical problems I went through...two HEALTHY baby girls were born. They stayed in our room with us and never saw the NICU. After 3 days we were sent home! I refused any pain medication after the C-Section because I was determined to nurse the girls. I knew the medication would make me loopy, and I didn't want any chance of the girls getting any traces of it. Honestly...it was painful, but not as painful as the last 9 months. What is amazing is that immediately after both pregnancies, I was able to eat like a normal person and keep food down again. AH....food has never tasted so good.

Nursing was a big challenge because of my nutrition issues. I was determined, but I also knew that it might not be a possibility. We tried to stay positive and just try as hard as we could. After a lot of prayer and determination, I am so thankful to say...they are 9 months old next week and have been breastfed exclusively! Another answer to prayer.

Lily & Lauren have brought such joy to our lives. They are a miracle and blessing from God. I wanted to share my story with you all, and also thank you for all your prayers and encouragement!